Egg Nog Review

This post was published more than a few years ago (on 2003-01-01) and may contain inaccurate technical information, outmoded thoughts, or cringe takes. Proceed at your own risk.

Well, okey, maybe this isn't technically a "rant," but it's not a book, movie or music review either. Maybe I need to need to create a catch-all category just called "reviews." One more thing to add to the redesign menu. But anyway, without further adoo (adieu?)…

Certainly, I'm a little late, but as of the start of this review, I still have a full thirty minutes in which to review these various egg nogs for your New Year's Eve drinking pleasure. And yes, I know I said I was going to go to bed early tonight, but I started watching Back to the Future, and ended up watching the entire trilogy. Sosumi.

Food Lion Pasteurized Homogenized Old Fashioned Egg Nog

What first struck me about this particular brand was the juxtaposition of "Pasteurized Homogenized" and "Old Fashioned" in the name, especially the way that "Old Fashioned" seems kind of crammed onto the label as an afterthought. I also like how it says "Satisfaction Guaranteed" on the back, as if in anticipation of some guy coming into the store with a half-drunk carton of egg nog and demanding his money back. As far as the nog itself goes, it tastes much like sweetened half-n-half with a 1/4 teaspoon of vanilla extract must taste. Blech.

Original Brand Pennsylvania Dutch Egg Nog: Made with Real Dairy Cream, Rum Brandy and Blended Whiskey"

I received this particular "Old Style Egg Nog" as a gift from a co-worker. At 14.75% alcohol by volume, this nog is the only one that actually contains any alcohol, including the ill-named Southern Comfort nog reviewed below. The nog is very much like what the label says, and… well… tastes like cream, rum, brandy and whiskey. Or at least it would if I had any clue as to what the distinct and various flavors of those alcohol things were. All things considered, I have the distinct impression that if I continued to drink it for any length of time, I would get stinking-ass drunk. 'Nuff said.

Land O Lakes Gourmet Eggnog: Holiday Collection

On the box, the word is written "Eggnog" all as one word, but there's a very small extra space between the "Egg" and the "nog," almost as if the packaging designers were hedging their bets about the public's acceptance of them making a compound word out of the more "old fashioned" separate words. This one is really, really, reeeeeally creamy, and reeks of nutmeg. I'm not sure if I love it or hate it. Possibly an okey drink, though my judgement may be more reliable if I weren't getting steeeenkiing drunk on this Pennsylvania Dutch stuff. Yep. Dronk.

Borden's Canned whatever it's called egg nog

Okay, so I don't have a can of this actually on hand, but I had one a few weeks ago, and my mom regularly served me nothing but (aside from one year's disasterous attempt at home-made) for 16+ years. It's thin, it's weak, it tastes watered-down, and lacking an any sort of flavor that I expect from my nog. Definitely the nog to keep in the bomb shelter, though. Although, I would think the PennDutch liquored up one should preserve pretty well, too.

Southern Comfort Vanilla Spice flavored Egg Nog Non-Alcoholic

Another example of trying to cram too much information onto the face of the carton, this nog tries to be all things to all people, and… well, honestly, it's not bad. It definitely lacks the kick of the P-Dutchy nog, but on the other hand, it also lacks the bite. Egg nog is supposed to be smooth— who wants it to bite? I mean, unless you're aiming to get stonkin' dronk. It is, indeed, very vanilla-y, which may be its only weak point. It's got a good slightly egg-y flavor, and just enough nutmeg to give it flavor, but not enough to choke the proverbial egg-nog-drinking horse.

The Winner

Southern Comfort is my final choice of a beverage that I have suddenly gotten very sick of drinking. But really, any of these lovely nogs will provide you with 26% of your RDA of saturated fat in only one 4 oz. serving, and isn't that what holiday fare is all about?

Mmmm… dronk.

36 thoughts on “Egg Nog Review”

  1. Borden’s Canned Egg Nog is designed to be a thinner variety. It is a quality product and a must for anyone’s Christmas or New Year’s celebrations. You can purchase it at [REDACTED]. Merry Christmas

  2. Hi Judi, sorry my response is so late! I don’t have any left but I know it’s very visible. I think it was towards the bottom of the neck. Also for those who have a Costco near you, that is where I discovered PD! So every year around the holidays is when they start to stock it again. I think they pretty much carry through the new year!
    Can’t wait til November!!! =)

  3. Just discovered this last weekend and I’m addicted! Just wondering what the actual ingredient info might reveal, ie is the cream from China (not sure that would stop me), or is this full of artificial junk?? Anyone been able to access an ingredient list anywhere??

  4. I have tried 2 or 3 of the ones listed above and I still have my hat off to the P-Dutchy egg nog~it numbs you up real fast during the holidays~

  5. Heidi M from Spring, TX

    I have been a devoted Pennsylvania Dutch drinker for 4 years now and I have to agree it gets you stonkin’ DRONK!@!!!! I absolutely love the stuff, and I am sure with my referals alone, I have made the manufacturer MILLIONS of dollars!! 🙂

  6. Shelley from the South

    Heidi, I agree three hundred percent. This nog rocks! I buy more and more every year. A bottle goes wherever I go and to whatever party. You and I should get paid for marketing this stuff. We WOULD make millions. 🙂

  7. My vote is definitely for Pennsylvania Dutch!! I’m drinking my first glass of the season right now! I love the smooth taste it has, one sip and I’m already feeling relaxed.
    I have a bottle from last year but not sure what the shelf life is, so I had to buy a new bottle today. If anyone knows the shelf life, please let me know!!

    Bottoms Up!! Happy Holidays!!

  8. the real borden egg nog in a carton in the dairy case is the best.

    the perfect combination of flavor and cream got to go with elsie.

  9. I wasn’t aware that Borden made a non-canned egg nog. In fact, neither is Borden. Where the heck did you see Borden in a carton?

  10. Stephanie help I’m in the same boat…I lOVE Pennsylvania Dutch, it is deifintely the best! I also have a bottle from last year….the new one I just bought has an expiration date of May 2007 so I’m thinkin the old bottle is not good??? I just have a hard time throwing a full unopened botttle of PD in the trash =(

  11. I had my first glass of PennDutch at Thanksgiving Dinner.. I had never heard of it before then and I live in Pennsylvania! It is delicious and I am definitely a new customer. 🙂

    If they don’t sell it where you live you can always order it offline.

  12. I LOVE this stuff, where can i find it in san pedro ca. one can truly get tipsy drinking this!!! please I need a place to buy the worlds best egg nog.
    thanks becky,
    dec 12 2006

  13. I would like to purchase a case of Pennsylvania Durch Egg Nog. Do you have any idea where I can purchase it.

    Thanks, Doris

  14. Lisa… man.. you should have called me. i would have helped ya get rid of that leftover bottle of PD for sure… ps, i also do some volunteer marketing myself, im a BIG fan!

  15. Loretta Bernardo

    Pennsylvania Dutch is the ticket. We’re two (2) weeks past the holiday and we’re still sippin on the stuff.

  16. Lisa, have looked all over P Dutchy bottle, can find no Xdate. Some numbers printed across the bottom of botl but they don’t look like X numbers. Where did you find Xdate? Judi

  17. I too love the stuff…Found 2 bottles from Christmas 2006 but can’t find xdate, just numbers stamped in 2 places on bottle: 6277 6893 13:18 on side and 42 22 204 06 0231 on bottom. Don’t know what they mean. Is it still good for Christmas 2007?

  18. Since there’s so much interest in all this nog stuff, I’ve now started a video podcast called NogCast. Check it out! We’ll definitely be covering the Pennsylvania Dutch nog with all the bottled spiked nogs, along with a whole host of others.

  19. Bonnie Anderson

    This year was my first introduction to the Pennsylvania Dutch egg nog – my daughter gifted me with a bottle. I just knew when she was born she was so special. I love egg nogs and this is the best ever! Wanted to get more, and 10 days from Christmas all the stores are sold out. The major BEV MO store says they can’t get any more.

  20. Ineed some pennysylvania dutch eggnog, where can i find it? HELP ME.This stuff is great.

  21. Brenda Randle

    To all of you, already conformed Penn Dutch Nog lovers out there, today, December 26, 2007, I tried this great Nog for the very first time and shared it with two other friends that feel like me, THIS STUFF ROCKS! I’ve loved egg nog all of my life and Southern Comfort was my fav before now, sorry SC, but Penn is the winner for me, hands down. This will be my shared nog forever and by the weekend I will be at Costco hoping that they have not run out by then.

  22. Monica Medice


  23. Richard Lehman

    For all those Dutch Nogg lovers here is a stash of answers. I am a Berks County Dutchman living in Kerrville Texas and can vouch for the best of the best. My last bottle from 2006 was enjoyed by many with no difference from my new case in 2007. Kerrville has been well stocked. Come and get it. Great gift item, too.




    Any Nog is good loaded with booze and ya drink enuff of it, just straight egg nogg, the taste goes to Southern Comfort, not cause I’m inda south, cause it taste’s real good like egg nogg should.
    enjoy yaselves…….Weedy

  26. I have to say Borden is my favorite nog. Its not cloyingly sweet like some and because it is thinner it doesn’t fill you up as quickly as the thicker nogs. I think if you genuinely like dairy products or milk then you will like the Borden brand.

  27. I discovered this stuff at Costco here in LA. I originally purchased as a gift for my Mom. As long as I can remember, she would usher in the Holiday season with a bottle of “Adult” eggnog. She would buy the regular (non-alcoholic) version for the kids, and the adults would safely indulge in the other. When I tried this 3 years ago, I discovered the truly brilliance blend of this holiday beverage. Sure, if consumed irresponsibly, one will get a lil’ tipsy. However, rolling it around on the tongue allows the blended spirits to release their individual aromas and flavors. Add to that the thick creamy texture of eggnog and you have the makings of a special blend done right the first time…when consumed responsibly.
    Here is simple Holiday drink.
    3¼ hours | 15 min prep | SERVES 12
    * 1 gallon peppermint ice cream
    * 1 gallon eggnog
    1. mix ingredients in bowl
    2. freeze for two hours.
    3. pour in cups and serve.

    Happy Holidays;-)

    A simple search will yield you online spirit store to get it you can’t order it from your local package store.

  28. Jeanell from Los Angeles

    Pennsylvania Dutch is the bomb egg nog. It knocks all of the other ones out of the box hands down. I’ve had the pleasure of drinking P.D. for the last 6 years since 2002 when I was introduced to it by a co worker. In the Southern CA area it can be purchased in the 1 gallon size at Costco and Sam’s club in either the individual bottle or by the case. Military families can purchase it on base at the commissary. In the LA area it can be purchased at the “Liquor Bank” store on Stocker near Crenshaw between mid November through early January. This is a seasonal item only. You can occassionally purchase this at Ralphs supermarket. Happy Holidays to all from an experienced P.D. drinker!

  29. Diane Savoie

    I LOVE P Dutch NOG! I actually add even a bit more rum (cheap stuff) to it. From the first sip I feel the warmth of the Christmas Spirit. It is the best and will recommend it to everyone!!! I live in MD and my sister lives in MN and they have it there too. We swear by it! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

  30. I received some pennsylvania dutch egg nog and it says best consumed
    by May 15, 2008. It is now December. Is it good still?

  31. jan — I would wager if you have had it refrigerated, it should still be fine. The alcohol content is high enough that it should last quite a long time unless spoiled by heat.

  32. Just found 5 bottles of PD hid in the closet – at least two years old 🙁 And now it has a brown coloring – DARN I bet the stuff isn’t any good anymore – but nowhere is there an expiration date of a web site to track down the company who makes it. And yes, it is the BEST (IMHO) Egg Nog on the planet!

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